A while back, we saw a trailer for Del Toro's take of Don't Be Afraid of the Dark. The trailer was really good, and Del Toro usually pops out pretty good movies. In a shock twist, this is a horror movie, which if you know me at all, you know I don't do.
No, not because I'm scared, because for the most part, they are shite. They either try to make you jump every thirty seconds (which you can see coming), or they try to throw as much blood around as is humanly possibly, or they come up with some really crappy "monster" or "creature" to kill everyone. And if it makes more than it cost, invariably, they churn out an equally craptacular sequel.
Final Destination anyone?
So anyway. Trailer: Good. We considered going to the movies, but with Xmas coming and birthdays and everything else, we said "screw it, we'll get it when it's out to rent"
All I can say is, thank all the is gory and blood-splattered that we didn't pay to see it at the cinema. Instead of being dark and scary with only the briefest flash of something out the corner of your eye, you're treated to CGI critters charging around trying to off the cast.
Even the "scary" bits weren't scary. I will prove how NOT scary it was:
Kellie didn't jump. Not once. Not even at the parts that she was SUPPOSED to jump at. At best, she managed a tired sigh. Maybe a brief rolling of the eyes.
The idea was there, but it falls into the Crappy Monster/Creature category I'm afraid. And yes, I am aware there is an original, and yes, I am sure you think it's better, but no, I can't be arsed with it I'm afraid.
Verdict: Pay some little kids to run around your house. The end result is probably going to be the same.