Bless

Wetting the bed at 5am is tiring for a wee girl.
Wee girl... Geddit?

Jo has started trying to get her out of night time pants, and last night she was apparently dry.  So I put some sacks under her sheets, put her in bed and... Sploosh.  At 2am.  So in response to her crying, I went up, changed her sheets, reapplied sacks under the sheets and put her back to sleep.

Repeat at 5am when I decided I couldn't be bothered to re-re-make her bed, so I stripped her bed, put the bedding on to wash, put her in some night time pants, and put her into my bed.  Of course, that made getting up fun this morning.  She finally got up - after I dragged her - at 0815.

Which is all fine and dandy, except we usually leave at about 0820.  Marvellous start to the week.  Thank f**k tomorrow is Jaysens last day of school!

How To Make A Grown Man Cry

Last night, I Tam was wandering around causing trouble as normal. Me, on the other hand, I was washing up and doing dinner. When Tam is "behaving" (being quiet and not breaking something) I tend to let her get on with it - she was "singing" in the dining room while I was at the other end in the kitchen.

"Daddy!"

I turn around to find this:


That's the Peanut, wearing a school dress that was put away for her many moons ago. And for some reason, it really choked me up. I thought of Bethy wearing a school dress (not that she ever did, it was too cold for her when she was in school!), and I realised how quickly Tam is growing up, that she will be in school too, and that she doesn't live with me any more...

I gave her lots of cuddles, sat her on the side next to me, and carried on doing dinner with a few sad little tears running down my face...

On The Meds

OK I'm kidding... mostly. See, while I am off my Happy Fun Pills, I am NOT off my "For-The-Love-Of-All-Things-Holy-OWIE!" pain killers. Unlike sadness and depression, chronic pain and missing-bits-of-spine don't go away.

Which is a shame, but still.

See, in my garden, I have a plant I've mentioned before. I'm not going into the SATAN of all plants, but if you're bored, have a google for Japanese Knotweed. I have that. Lots and lots of that.

I had to contact DEFRA (Department for Environment, Food and Rural Affairs) about the plant after being bounced from council, environment agencies, departments for this, that and the other. DEFRA are a nice group - they are the ones that deal with the nice stuff, Foot & Mouth, Bluetongue, Avian Flu... All the good stuff.

Oh, and now, Knotweed.

I had to leave the garden while they investigated and looked into it as it's a bitch. Once you have it, you have it. Anyway, a nice lady called me this morning and said as long as I don't dump it, shred it, landfill it or anything else, I can rip that fecker up. Of course, to get to it, we had to get the tribe of pygmys to allow us to hack through the grass jungle. So me and the boy hacked, and mowed, and strimmed, and piled... Took us three hours, but we found various things, most importantly, the gravel and the lawn:


OK, to put this in perspective - the shed at the end of my garden was all but hidden. The metal washing-line-pole was missing. Of course, it's not tidy by a long shot yet. There's actually a PATH on my lawn but it's well grown over. And no, I still don't have a fence. And yes, the rear-neighbours do have a pool. And yes, the house on the right has a lovely garden. If you look carefully, that pile of GREEN next to my shed - that's the stack of knotweed that was covering the lower half of the garden.

And to give you an idea of this weed... See the fence panel on the left of my garden? See the green plant growing next to it? THAT, my friends, is knotweed. Mine wasn't quite that tall, but still - that is 5 weeks of growth. That's a seven-foot tall fence panel. Still not impressed? Go right, to the paved garden, and go to the end of their garden where it backs onto the people behind... See the green behind their shed and their neighbour? Yeah, that's it too. That's how far it's spread. It's two or three doors to the left and right, and one garden back.

Here is a detailed artist impression of what my garden looked like before we used MANLY skills on it.


Actually, I am quite impressed by the depth in that image. My art skills are clearly improving. But that pretty much summed up my garden. Sally could go out there and vanish in the grass. I had to wear my big clumpy boots incase I found a snake out there. *shudder*

But anyway, to the subject at hand. I am now sitting with fluffy-leg sensation, and am listening to very loud music and waiting for the Mother F'king pain to jump on the bus and get outta Dan Town. Head Meds - gone. Back Meds - My Friends.

A Bethy Moment

With everything going on of late, I've not really spoken about Bethy. A few new people in my life have asked about her, and I've pointed them in this direction. Obviously I still miss the little madam something crazy, but I don't sit and cry all the time.

Another sure sign coming OFF the meds is working out for me.

However, yesterday... You knew there was a but coming, didn't you!

While Jo and Steve were here collecting some more of her stuff, Jo came down with Bethy's doctor coat that was in the cupboard in the bedroom:


We both looked at it and smiled, I said she could take it back to hers with her, and that was that. Spent a little while thinking about her, but then soon carried on with my day.

About an hour later, Jo sent me a message saying that she was fine with the coat, but obviously Bethy had eaten while in it, and she found some food marks on it - and THAT is what set her off. So Jo was texting me in tears, which set me off. Not sob-sob, just a quiet little cry.

Within 30 seconds, my music shifted to the next track on my playlist, and off ALL the tracks on my computer - nearly 3000 - it happened to be Evanescence - My Immortal. Bethy's funeral song.



THEN I was sobbing like a baby. It doesn't help that I am tired, run down, and the weather yesterday was shite but not long after I had a cry, the sun came out, and I felt better again. Ruth called, asked what was up, and I ended up going over there for a late lunch before the school run.

It was almost like my little lady was up there looking down getting my attention. And now, blogging about it, I feel fine - a little sad, maybe - but otherwise OK.

Hope you're having fun up there my gorgeous.
x

Oh My..

OK, it's May. Apologies for the quality of the photo but when grabbing the phone to take a picture I didn't realise the flash was on...

(No) Musical Monday

So, once again, I'm late with my Musical Monday post. However, I've gotten in this evening, and with so much going on in my head, I am actually copping out. I hold my hands up and say "I gots nuffin guv"

This weekend, I shifted the kids off to Jo and headed over to Ruths. Her fella was down, and needed help lugging a bloody great rather heavy television, as well as having his computer looked at. TV, not an issue, we got it in and spent an hour fiddling with connections. However, the banana head managed to forget his hard drive... Ho hum.

Saturday I cleaned, then Kellie came over before we both jumped on a bus and headed back to our old stomping ground. She used to live next door to me, and we have plenty of memories of accident, injury, falling off/over/through things, so we decided to go back home, stopping at my mums for a coffee.

Was great to look at the places we used to terrorise, and marvelled at how similar but different it was, how walls and trees we used to climb just seemed dinky now, and how the walk to the local shop and then the school was a few minutes - I'm sure they used to be miles from home.

Then we headed over through the old Laindon Shopping Center. Wow... It used to be a concrete and depressing stand of shops - now it's a concrete and really depressing stand of boarded up shops. Headed over to Gemma and Petes to see Zoe and Amy. Ooooh broody. Zoe is lovely, Amy stole all my money, but I got a beer out of it, so you know, fair trade off ;)

I would detail what happened after leaving Gemmas, but I promised my guest that I'd not mention her weak bladder or her doing the "Don't Pee Myself" dance. Suffice to say, after not seeing Gemma for the better part of fifteen years, Gemma saw Kellie twice in one day.

Then it was back to mine, grab my stuff and head over to Kellies. Bus ride, walk, collected her kids, ordered chinese food (Yes, I'm a lardy) and then spent the evening drinking and watching comedy telly, and one of the Jackass movies. Oooh how we chuckled. Well, I chuckled, she chuckled and gagged.

Sunday we nearly got lost wandering to her sons football practice, then wandered home where she sorted out a roast dinner. Yummy. Did I mention I'm a lardy? Then it was a few more drinks before I had to head home in time to have the Boy returned to me.

After an early night - and waking up with a snotty nose and sore throat... I headed over to see Jo's new place. Oooh it's purdy. While wandering lost on an estate I should know, I gained a stalker. Now, aside from the fact I should be used to stalkers (as, let's face it, I have a few of them!) I was completely unfazed while people I've told today have said they would be scared...


He literally popped out of a bush next to me as I walked through the estate, and followed me from ten - maybe fifteen feet - for about twenty minutes. People kept stopping and staring at me as though I was The Crazy Fox Man or something. Even after coming out of Jo's place, he was there and around for a few more minutes before heading off into a bush where I assume he had a nap.

After having lunch with Jo and Tam, I headed back to Ruths, then school run, then back to Ruths for dinner until finally, being knackered and feeling a bit icky, I headed home. I think the plan for this evening is to throw the boy in the washing machine, get the tiny bit of washing up washed, then have a shower and maybe an early night.

How was your weekend :D

Is It Me?

I am not going to comment on this, but I took this picture today in the childrens section of a local book store. Is it just me that sees it?!

Xmas?!

I seriously hope they just need to change the shopping trolley ads, and aren't starting just yet ;)

When Spiders Get Big

Spiders, as a rule, do not bother me. I can grab a spider, and save it from the threat of a boot, bug killer, hungry cat or whatever else might be looking to have a pop at the wee little arachnid.

There are exceptions, however. I am scared of snakes. Big, Small, Fat, Thin, Long, Short - blergh, evil nasty things. But spiders don't bother me. They do, however, bother Ruth, and over the weekend, she asked if I could help her with her garden. Not mainly because it's a tough job, but because it meant going into The Shed.

Yes, I capitalised. The Shed. Because it is evil. It's light and airy, but the cobwebs in there are enough to catch, say, Me. Which make you wonder, what on earth spins webs that size.

Ruth is scared of her shed because of this sort of thing...




I promise that this photo has not been altered in ANY way. Nor did I use any special photography equipment - that's taken with my phone... If you want, you can click to embiggen those pictures. But that is just one of the buggers I noticed while in there, which got me to thinking. If that bastard is sitting quietly by the door, waiting to grab you as you walk in, what about the ones you can't see.

As he came out from under his shovel - which is where he lives - I swear I could hear his boots clumping and his sleeves being rolled up. "Wot ya doin' in me shed then?"

I'm not a girl, but I didn't want to hang around in there. Mower, Strimmer, gerrout.

Of course, I fully understand that the spiders of, say, Australia are bigger, nastier and suchlike, but I make do with what I have. That's not saying the spiders over here are rubbish. Gemma got bitten by a spider once when she was little. Screamed blue murder about it. And, being that I am such a kind, compassionate and very very caring older brother, I laughed and took the piss out of her mercilessly for months.

Until I got into bed and got bitten by a spider. I spent ten minutes wondering if it was one of the urban legend spiders that come over in fruit or plants and kill people. Spiders bite dammit, poisonous or not!

So next time you're heading to the shed, remember, Fred and his mates are watching you, just biding their time...

Help The Homeless

Help the homeless
Originally uploaded by Balakov

Poorly...

She was sick last night, is hot today, and not a happy bunny.
Well, she wasn't till I gave her some medicine - she's currently attacking Jaysen..

Goggles

It could be said that Tam is, at times, a little bit... 0dd. To be fair to her, she DOES have some interesting genes going on... My brains, good looks and, er, well, I think that's all she needs really..

But none the less, she has developed from somewhere, a rather 0dd streak. Sometimes she likes to wear her knickers on her head. Sometimes she likes to sleep under the duvet, around the wrong way, with her feet up on the pillow. Some days she just chatters away in her own language, much like Leeloo in The Fifth Element when she crashes into the taxi cab.

While poodling around the various blogs I read, I came across Nutty Mummy on The Little Nut Tree discussing one of her wee ones sudden love of goggles. And while reading it, I could only think of my daughter on one of her strange moments.

See, Tam owns goggles, but hates them - with a passion - in the bath or shower. However, as is the case with Her Strangeness, she loves them all the time away from the bath.




Yes folks, she is wearing her goggles, and her hair inside them, just because she likes to. If you have long hair, have you ever tried to drag a pair of goggles over your head?? It's painful, yet she likes to do it, and she does it a lot.

Maybe it's just a phase... I'm still going through it. It should stop any time now....

The Sis, BIL, And A-to-Z of Nieces

Because the world is filled with that strange creature known as "The Broody Woman" and I have been getting pestered, here are some more pictures of the newborn English er, Longley. Gemma is married. Duh.

Gemma (Post C-Section!), Amy (Looking SO impressed) and Baby Zoe!

Pete (BIL, on Gemmas meds by his expression), Amy riding Daddy, Baby Zoe not allowed on furniture.

A is for "Cheeky Monkey"

Z is for "Awww"

And Z is for "More Awww"

The Baby Now Arriving On Platform Two...

Had to use ImageShack as Blogger is screwing for some reason.

But anyway, this is Zoe, born at 10.04am today, weighing in at seven-pounds-something by C-Section. And as noted by Jo earlier, Gemma now has Amy and Zoe, babies A to Z!

Slave Labour - Alive And Well

It wasn't that long ago that kids over here were used in order to perform menial tasks. Chimney sweeping and coal mining mostly. But with these new fangled laws protecting the young and offering them an "edumacation" it means that other poor saps - namely, grown ups - have to perform these tasks that were the only way the kids went out and got some fresh air.

So, in order to bring the harsh reality of the real world to my daughter, I set her to work this morning.



I can't shelter her forever, and there will come a time - hopefully around her 12th birthday - that I will be able to marry her off to someone wealthy and she will be ready to perform the fulfilling tasks such as washing up, laundry, housework... I would have got her doing the ironing today but her pesky female-arm-muscles need building up in order to push the scorching metal across the clothing.

She's rubbish really. No muscle, very slow at her job... Maybe I'll be able to sell her off to someone and get a decent dowry for her. She sucks a hoovering as well.

(hahar! sucks, hoovering...)

I think I might get her up the rickety ladder later to clean the windows... Maybe give her the bleach and get her scubbing the loo...

It Came From Outer Space

It's my blog, and I can say what I like :D Anyways, for those of a broody nature, for those that want to see the shocking images of a Pregnant whale Little Sister, I bring you..




And I quote: "The first one is from a week or so ago and the other 2 are from yesterday when I was 3 days overdue."

Nice lady-like position in that last one Gemma. Such a classy bird. I don't even need to point out to other readers that you are in fact an Essex Girl... And if people are feeling REALLY brave, they can click to make them bigger!

PUUUUSH!

Vroom Vroom

I'm not a car-freak. Car crasher, maybe, but not a car freak. I can, however, fully appreciate a car that looks nice. Torque, HP, Braking Power, and all that milarky mean precisely bugger all of nothing to me, but I can look at a nice car and like how it looks or sounds.

While blog hopping earlier, I can across Claire's newest entry regarding a couple of cars that are for sale. Both are famous. One was in a magazine that she did the photography for, and the other was made into a cake.

OK, so maybe one is more famous than the other, but you get the idea!

For those local to Essex that are in the market for a new car - or even not local, knowing some petrol heads will drive miles for a new car - I figured I'd link to the cars for anyone that might be interested.

BMW M3 SMG II 3.2 (Semi-Automatic)

Toyota Yaris SR vvt-i 16v 1.3

Don't contact me for info about them though - to me they are just cars for sale - click the link/photo to see more photos of the cars and the seller information!

Happy Birthday Peanut

21st March. I can't believe how time has flown. Today is Tamsyns 3rd birthday. Of course, it goes without saying that today is another date that reminds me how long Bethy has been gone. Tam is 3, Bethy has been gone three years one month.

But that isn't what today is about.

I can't believe she is three. It doesn't seem that long ago she was this little squidgy thing that needed protecting from everything around her, and today, well, she still needs protecting, but she'll give it hell...

She's growing fast, and she is a complete little smart arse, but refuses to talk. I'm hoping that it's just her being lazy though, as she seems to have her own language. She uses lots of words, and every now and then comes out with something new that she refuses to repeat until she decides to do it again.

She is a complete Aries, strong willed, stubbon, has awful mood swings... That screaming child in the supermarket? That's my daughter.

But, even though she is a complete mummys girl, she is becoming more and more of a Daddys Little Princess. It's tough being wrapped around another little finger, but I can handle it. She gives the nicest cuddles, and when she's in a good mood, will do almost anything you ask, from cleaning up to running stuff up and down the stairs.

Tamsyn, my little Peanut,
I can't believe how beautiful you are. Clearly, you've not gained that from me, and that's a bless. You are a beautiful little girl, even if you are a monster some days.

Some days I wish you could chatter away with me and I wouldn't have to concentrate on your words. You have so much going on in your head, and I'd love for you to share it, for us to understand what point it is you are trying to get across.

Yes, I wish you weren't quite as much of a monkey as you can be, and while the wall art throughout the house will always remind me of you, I think the walls would look better without thick blue marker or similar designs.

You are going to be such a smart little girl, and I wish so much that you grow to be as happy as you are now, to enjoy life and to know all the best things that are out there - love, happiness, peace, fun, and to experience everything the world has to offer.

I love you so much, and know mummy loves you as much as me. Jaysen might get moody with you when you push his playstation off the shelf, but he loves you lots too. I know Bethy is out there too somewhere, suggesting things to you that drives you on to do or say the strangest things. I know she's told you how horrible my stubble is, but I'll keep it trimmed and shaved, I promise.

I love watching you grow, love seeing your eyes light up at something new.

I know our family is a strange one, but you will get used to it. Mummy and Daddy are still friends, and even though we don't live together, we both love you very much.

Happy birthday, my gorgeous little Peanut.

All our love,
Daddy and Mummy

And, as usual, here are photos of the little monkey through the last few years, in no real order. The last one, however, was taken yesterday.

Click any of them to embiggen them!

An Ouchie

Some days I wake up and think "What shall I do today?" while other days - like today - I woke up and thought "Mmmpfghhh?" Of course, that's what happens when you're kept awake till 6am.

Of course, the downside to this is that when I get tired, I am either mentally or physically incapable of functioning. And on other days - like today - I suffer from both physical and mental floopiness.

Yes, floopiness.

So this afternoon me and Jaysen had hankering for cheese, onion and salad cream sarnies. We had a fresh loaf, some nice cheese, new onions and a full bottle of salad cream. All was buttered, prepared, sliced, laid out and ready to be cut.

Slice.
Chop.



Click them to open them up and see the full oozy gory goodness. I actually stuck the knife into the bone which, obviously, hurt. Still, I am sure Cheese, Onion and Salad Cream Sandwiches are sterile.

I assume the gross stuff oozing from the injury is a pocket of fat. Needless to say, my finger is killing me. Pah, I knew I should have stayed in bed.

Sexy...

Yeah, she'll kill me when she finally sees it...


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