Empty Bottles & Cans

Once again, I spent the weekend away with Kellie.  Yes, I am spending an obscene amount of time with her, but at the risk of inducing vomiting amongst my readership, we love being together, and are not stomping on any toes, so we're having as much fun as we can get.

Got over there Friday after having a nervous breakdown about being late... Not that I was "due" at any particular time, but as we had to go out (as a couple!) that night, I was all flapping and stuff.  Still, arrived with plenty of time, sorted out an over-night bag from my weekend-bag and headed out - armed with booze.

Being that I am ever so good with names, I was dropped into a room of people.  Obviously, Kellie and Me... Her best friend Kerry, her fella Paul, her brother Kevin, his missus Kelly, and their friends Haley and her fella Mark.  And kids.  Seven, I think...  No, eight.  Well, none of mine, so there could have been fifty.

And we did the drinky drinky drinky till the wee small hours.  Glasses were smashed, drinks were spilled in torrents, nibbles were consumed, Chinese food was ordered (and subsequently scoffed)...  The Beer Fog started to settle...

Half the adults, and their respective spawn left, while the other half stayed.  We ended up crashing on the living room floor, and didn't wake till the ripe time of 7am.  Hangover free, I should add.

Me and Kellie set to clearing up the kitchen while the house slept, me fine, her... Well, not at her best.  Like I say - I didn't have a hangover ;)

Kerry and Paul emerged nearer 10am, Paul fine, Kerry in the same state as Kellie.  So they were indeed mocked.  And forced to cook breakfast.

Which, as it would happen, would provide me with hours of chuckles.  See, getting two drunk, hungover girlies to cook is actually a BAD idea in the grand scheme of things.  Sausages: Burnt.  Bacon: Burnt.  Mushrooms: Cooked to perfection (amazingly). Scrambled Eggs: Burnt, Still moving, moist and a very strange colour.

And texture.  The eggs had a whole new texture.  And flavour.

I'm not sure how, but the other three adults managed to fob off food on the unsuspecting kids, while me... I ate all mine.  I have a cast iron gut ;)

The breakfast really really deserves it's own entry... "Legendary" would be one word to use.

Another highly amusing aspect to boozing with a group of people you don't know - I can ALWAYS find the geek in the crowd... I heard the words "World of Warcraft" and the ocean of people parted - Kevin, Kellies best friends brother - is a WoW player, and we spent much time that evening talking about it.  Much to the chargrin of the normal non-WoW players.

So, despite taking the piss out of her Best Friend, we get on quite well (which is points to me), and Kevin told Kellie I'm great and get two thumbs up from him too!  Did I mention that Kerrys family is like Kellies second family, so I need approval from them as well!

I bribed Kerry with vodka, so that helped ;)

The rest of Saturday was spent with the older kids at football, followed by a jaunt back to Kellies with all the bags - lighter, now emptied of booze - and had a quiet afternoon together, followed by a curry.  Yep, I'm a lardy - but it was mostly veg ;)  AND no booze ;)

Sunday started lazy.  Kellie tried flexing her girlie muscles, and ended up with very tickled feet.  Which she hates.  Once up, I tackled her garden for her... Which again, really deserves it's own post.  Suffice to say, I shall never hardly moan about Ruths garden from now on.  At least her garden is just grass.  Kellies garden had everything...

And I got a big fast blister for my troubles.  Which she put chemicals on.  Which burnt.  Ow.

Sunday was going perfectly - we got to the bus stop at half four, ready for my 4.50pm bus.  And we waited.  And waited...  Now, if you want to be in my good books and say "I will be there at, say, 4.50pm" then you better damn well be there no later than 4.50pm.  A few minutes early I can handle.  4.55 and I will start getting stroppy.

So at 5.15pm, Kellie called her mum and arranged me to go home when she went past.  As you can imagine, your normally very-placid author was, at this time, ten feet tall, green, ripped clothes...  I will write them a very nice letter tomorrow no doubt.

But every cloud - I got another 45 mins with Kellie.

And finally, after collecting the boy, having a drink with Jo and Steve, walking home, got the boy showered and bedded... Now I am flopped.  Aching, sore blister (owie!), tired, missing Kellie...

Who, no doubt, will come along and attempt to save her character, but to be honest, I think I may have already ruined that just by her associating with me...

The only down part, aside from not seeing Kellie till Tuesday, is that I had a lot of questions about Bethy this weekend.  Now, I have no issue at all talking about her, and will always tell people I have three kids, one of which isn't here any more.  I think it was more having to talk to people that have no idea about her, what happened, the why's and where-fores.  I was fine, but when I finally got in and sat, the first song my computer decided to play was her song...




As I say, the hardest part was the fact that all my friends, most of my family, and those that know me, they know as much as they can what happened, what she went through... But now I am meeting new people and talking about ME, Bethy enters the conversation that don't know, don't understand and don't realise how unlucky they are for not meeting her. I'm OK now though, had a sad moment so did the stupid taggy thing in a crappy frame of mind, but still.

Anyway, I am fine and dandy once more - counting the days till Tuesday when, incidently, I have a man coming to look at my fence.  Or lack thereof.  I sent them a letter that rattled them into action ;)

So nighty night!

Edit: I forgot to add, the ULTIMATE part of the breakfast was the Tea and Coffee... But that's because it WAS perfect, as I made it!

A Trend

Something I've noticed over the years, is that some bloggers - the popular ones - get book deals. More and more, you'll see a blogger mention they've gotten a book deal, that they can't believe it's happened, and so on and so forth.

The run up to the book is a flurry of activity for the blogger, with their posts slowing down somewhat while they write their "story" or whatever it is they are doing. Most posts seem to concentrate on the book itself. Then the book is released, and the blogger mentions it, where he/she will be appearing for signings, how it's doing and so on...

And when the dust settles... Now, I can't put my finger on it, but that blog changes. It goes from being a single person writing about, well, whatever the theme is on their blog, to all sorts of stuff. Sometimes, they hardly even talk about the original purpose of the blog at all.

I'm not going to name blogs, but in the last couple of years, I've noticed at least four bloggers that have become published authors and pretty much stopped with their usual blogging. A couple have gone very political, topical... Another has taken to publishing random stuff about the state of the country, or just posting random links to news stories. The actual content has all but vanished - the reason I was reading is no longer there.

I imagine it's because all the stuff they would be publishing is now being saved up somewhere for Book Deal #2.

Then there is the other kind of "changed blogs", the sort that have gotten so popular, that they have various adverts, worry about page rank, and a lot of their posts suddenly become One Big Advert for various products and stuff they have been sent. You might still get the content on there, but it's Ad Post Post Ad Ad... All with flicky flashy banner ads and stuff in between.

It makes me a sad panda.

I unsubscribed from six blogs this morning. I love bloggers for who they are, the people aspect of things, not to see the latest products here, or a political rant there. I subscribed to their blogs because what they had to say was interesting, moved my mind, made me think, or showed me an altogether different life.

Now they are just more grey noise in a large field of grey noise.

PS: If I ever become a World Famous Blogger And/Or Author, please kindly take this post and ram it down my throat to point out everything I've said. I like who I am, I love what 0ddness is.

PPS: If you want to send me a Large Electrical Item to review, then please feel free ;)

Big Fat Congrats

I don't care if you don't read her blog.  I don't care if you have no idea who I am talking about, but none the less...

Laney, over at My Crazy Family, has just announced the fact she's been knocked up.  AGAIN.  This baby will be Child #4 at her house.

So all of you, waddle on over to her blog and send her your congrats.  Because once she starts getting massive, I will be heckling her in person and taking the piss out of her waddle.  I'm nice like that, really.

Congrats Laney and Mr Laney.  Hope you have a nice boring pregnancy.  With twins.  Twins are cool.  Big fat twins.

With big heads.

Logo A-Go-Go

As is probably apparent to everyone visiting here - not your dirty RSS-Readers tho - but I have a logo.  An new logo.  A proper logo for my blog finally!

As the little post icon here probably suggests, it was made by a rather strange girl that lives in some coal-mining village up norf somewhere.  She stay home on the computer all day because she suffers, like the rest of her community, with Black Lung and other mining-related ailments.

And, out of the kindness of her heart, she made me a logo!  Huzzah!

She's one of the girls that was at my weekend at the Posh Palace back in May, that spent the best part of the evening completely bemused and amused by plastic beer cups.  Clearly, the technology known as "Plastic" has yet to make it's way to the norf.  She's a blogger, but obviously using a stolen laptop with a mobile broadband connection...  You can visit her (new) blog through this link.

Little does she know, I think I will start collecting logos for my blog and have them alternate around and change for a bit of variety :)  900x204 are the banner dimensions, FYI ;)

If you want to make a logo - and I mean a semi-decent one, not someone having a laugh in Paint and scrawling "0ddness" then chuck it on over and I will A) use it, B) link to you, and C) take the piss out of you!

So, to Miss Lynzi, thank you :D  I'd buy you a pint o' bitter, but your whippet will prolly have me.

Mine's Prettier Than Yours

For a while now I've been playing around with Blogger In Draft - that is, technically, the Beta Version of all the fangled new stuff they are working on. I've mentioned it before, and have been playing with some of their stuff before people not on Draft get to play with it.

Nothing is secret (at least, I hope not. Please don't tell me off!) on there, and anyone can access it through the afore-mentioned link (here, in case you're dim) and I've used some of the new stuff - the New Post list I had for a while was part of that (which is now available to all), and the future posting I use every now and then is rather handy, again, available to all.

Yesterday I thought I had broken something when I logged in. Usually, when I get to the dashboard, I see what you see:


Not really a lot I can comment on it really - it's nothing new. However, yesterday...


It's all very shiny and professional looking. Not sure why I like it more, I just do.

Who knows, maybe you peons will get yours updated in the coming days ;)

In other news... People that are getting sick to the teeth of Twitter being a complete pain in the rectum, Matt and Sam have found Plurk. It's similar to twitter, except it seems to work (oooh meow!) and has a purdy interface thingie that shows the posts on a timeline - and you can reply to them, unlike Twitter where things got... well, kinda knotted and tangled.

I'm still getting to grips with it, and it does have a few things that I would like to see done differently, but I've already put my two pence in to see what happens there. Still, go take a peek. You can see my Plurk page here

De-Lurk Ya Bastards!

Yes, the Hooded Claw. Dark, hidden, mysterious. And the very embodiment of my blogs biggest reader base - the mysterious lurker.

So here it is. Say Hi. De-Lurk. Post a "howdy" comment, let me know who you are, even if you want to use a fake name to protect your identity. Don't use "Me" as I seem to have about a berjillion of "Me" reading. Let me know where you're from. How long have you been reading? Did you follow a link or trip over my infamy some other way?

Even you bastards reading on an RSS Feed that don't come visit, click that link and come visit.

I don't mind if you just found me today. I don't mind if you've been reading for a few days, weeks, months or - for the rare reader - years. Say hello.

Don't make me threaten the kitten. Because I will if I have to.


Think of the kitten.

Edit: Three days to go on my Delurkers week, and HURRAH! Thanks to everyone delurking, now for the rest of you to do it too! Go on, you know you want to ;)

Goggles

It could be said that Tam is, at times, a little bit... 0dd. To be fair to her, she DOES have some interesting genes going on... My brains, good looks and, er, well, I think that's all she needs really..

But none the less, she has developed from somewhere, a rather 0dd streak. Sometimes she likes to wear her knickers on her head. Sometimes she likes to sleep under the duvet, around the wrong way, with her feet up on the pillow. Some days she just chatters away in her own language, much like Leeloo in The Fifth Element when she crashes into the taxi cab.

While poodling around the various blogs I read, I came across Nutty Mummy on The Little Nut Tree discussing one of her wee ones sudden love of goggles. And while reading it, I could only think of my daughter on one of her strange moments.

See, Tam owns goggles, but hates them - with a passion - in the bath or shower. However, as is the case with Her Strangeness, she loves them all the time away from the bath.




Yes folks, she is wearing her goggles, and her hair inside them, just because she likes to. If you have long hair, have you ever tried to drag a pair of goggles over your head?? It's painful, yet she likes to do it, and she does it a lot.

Maybe it's just a phase... I'm still going through it. It should stop any time now....

On Being Banned

I wouldn't bandy the term "addicted" around very much usually, but I have noticed that I am rather... Well, bored. Usually when I get up, I check mail, stats, news, blogs, facebook. The last isn't just "checking", it's replying to messages, playing games, sending gifts, posting on walls, saying hi to friends.

I never had much in the way of applications unlike some people out there - my profile page usually loaded after a few seconds - but there were things on there I liked to do.

I'm still trying to think as to the why I got banned, and really cannot figure it out.

• I sent 15 Ann Summers gifts out
• I invited several friends to Owned and Scramble
• I SuperPoked everyone with the Poke of the Day
• I made nearly a million dollars buying and selling my friends
• I took two surveys
• I sent a half-dozen messages to my Aussie Stalker
• I posted on a couple of other peoples Walls
• I poked. As usual ;)

Now the ONLY thing that was different about yesterday was the poking strangeness and what I thought to be broken friend request. First, the poking. The only person on was Mel, discussing, er, stuff. I noticed that when I poked her back, another poke instantly appeared from her. I'm not talking with a few seconds delay, but instantly. The second thing was a friend request from Mels hubby. I clicked "confirm friend request" and went back to my front page, where there was a friend request from Mels hubby. Which I confirmed, only for it to get replaced by a friend request from Mels hubby, which I confirmed, and so on.

Typical bloody Australians get me banned it would seem ;) Wenches and Convicts the lot of em.

Other than that, I have NO clue what I could have done to earn myself a ban. That list is what I do pretty much every single morning. Then I am on and off facebook during the day as and when I get a chance. I'm still getting the "Your account has been disabled by an administrator" message trying to log in. No reply to the three emails I've sent them. Emmas group has started getting lots of members - I was in bed last night texting her names of people I could remember on there, but having NO head for names or anything, I was struggling. I was texting her names, she was hunting them down and sending them messages...

Only to get a warning for being a spammer! hehe

My StatCounter has shown that the group has doubled the traffic to my blog yesterday - from 80-100 hits to just over 200. Not too shabby really.

But I am bored. I don't play WoW all the time, and I've read the internet. Usually an evening unwinding would involve kicking arses at Scrabble or Word Twist, but not last night. If it gets too bad I might have to resort to drastic measures...

*gulp*

I might have to turn on the telly.

To Sum Up...

Around midday today, Ruth called - she has her fella Paul down this weekend, and knowing I'm having a crappy weekend, she gave me a shout and offered hot cross buns for lunch, and a roast dinner this evening. Who am I to say no to her nurturing needs...

So instead of moping around the house, I headed over there and chilled out - though this time she only made me do her washing up instead of full-blown housework for a change.

Jo called while I was there, called me a banana for thinking the way I was, and for the first time in a long time, I spoke to her about my fears and suchlike. I was hiding down the end of Ruths garden so I couldn't be overheard, not because I don't want Ruth to know, but I was being a girl as usual.

Marvellous really.

Lack of sleep, compounded by wandering brain thoughts and just not being clear in my head all piled up, and I was at the end of Ruths garden crying down the phone to Jo about various stuff that I can't/won't share here. Nothing about Me and Jo, other stuff involving my life. She was able to help get my head clear, but I've still had a rough day.

I've been checking my mail on my phone to see if Facebook decided to reply - they didn't, but then, it is Sunday so no doubt they have better things to do that respond to people they have (apparently) banned randomly. Cass mailed me to let me know she had a random warning last week, and Deb also mentioned she had a couple of warnings, so *fingers crossed* this is something automated and erroneously random. By the same token, I'd not be surprised if there was something I've done unknowingly.

I was very surprised by a message from Emma earlier on this afternoon telling me she has set up a group to fight for my membership! Not sure what will come of it, but as of now (19:20) I have sixteen supporters! Em set up a group to get me back on, and Mand is on the sidelines with her pompoms out... Crazy girlies ;) Apparently the link to the left in the Cbox will take you to the group if you're a member... Well, if you're not a banned member anyway ;)

I got in a little while ago, have loud music on and am ignoring phones. To sum up: I'm still fed up (though feeling the luuuurve), I'm bored, I ran out of Twitter SMS Updates, so am sending messages but have to log in to see replies, I'm still banned on Facebook, and my laptop is still not coming on at all which has REALLY hacked me off no end.

Now to wait for Jaysen to come home, bribe him with an early (ish) night or else, and for me to try and sleep tonight. Of course, tomorrow is the start of a new week, which no doubt means all the shit will be starting over in less than twelve hours.

Can't wait...

To RSS or Not To RSS?

I am an avid blog reader. I read all sorts of blogs, from the various CHD parent blogs, general family blogs, a few tech blogs, random amusement blogs and adult blogs. I think my daily is something like fifty or so blogs that update frequently.

Yeah, I read a lot.

With my reading list so long, I originally used Firefox to open all the blogs I read, and went through them one by one, leaving comments, spamming tag boards and generally putting my oar in, regardless of it being wanted or needed. And then, I started pottering around with Google Reader, and using blogs RSS Feeds to read them away from the actual blog.

It was quick, easy and simple to use. It showed me what blogs had or had not updated, opened in one window, and meant I didn't have to sift or trawl through the unread blogs to find the ones with new content.

However, my issue with that is it's more like socialising with a friend over the phone that sitting in their living room. Bear with me on this one...

I create my blog to make my readers feel welcome. While I am always changing the template for ME, ultimately, you guys are the ones that get to see. There is stuff of interest on there for you - links to other sites, for example. There is also the Tag Board and Cam (when it's on) so you have a little more to do on your visit. With the RSS Reader, it doesn't matter how neat and tidy the place it - you don't get to see it.

So here's my bind. The Lazy Shit inside me wants to click one link and see all the content hand-delivered to me. Simple, lazy, ease of use. The Not So Lazy Shit inside me would rather go to each blog, see how nice it is, interact with you. Still simple, more personal.

Sunny Sunday

Poor neglected Bloggy. Ah well ;) Anyways, the sun is currently beaming in through the front of the house - great for us smelly bears that like the sun, not so great for us geeks that have a monitor near a window with afore-mentioned sun streaming in.

Meh, I'll survive!

Last few days have been a bit busy, with a family do yesterday for my nans 80th, plus entertaining squids, housework (which only appears when the mini-me's do) and generally out and about. Oh, and Ruth has fed me again too.

Tam and Jaysen are off to Jo's parents today, Tam to stay, Jaysen will be back this evening but wants to see Mummy. So they get a roast dinner. The original plan was a boys day before school, but now I get a day to chill out (and bloody wake up!) before school restarts tomorrow.

In other news, I've been poking around the Blogger in Draft stuff, which is basically where they test random stuff. Down the bottom right, you will see the blogroll reproduced, but in order of most-recent-posts. Be warned, some of those ARE adult blogs, but I will figure how to rename them later. Seems quite nifty for people wanting to blog hop but bored of reading the out of date stuff.

Update your blogs you stinkers!

And while I am prattling on - another nifty feature in the Blogger in Draft stuff - timed posts... That is, a post that you write, set a date for it to publish and Robert's your Mothers Brother. Which will mean I should miss less Musical Mondays. The links to Draft are dotted through this post - you know you're on there when the Blogger Logo is blue.

Anyway - if you've not seen me on your blog of late, don't fret. Where I've got SO DAMN MANY blogs to read (which, I may have mentioned previously, you need to update more!) I've taken to reading all of them through Google Reader. I have it sorted so I see all the new posts, which makes my life so much easier - no need to trawl through nearly 70 blogs looking for new content when it shows me what's new instead.

Huzzah!

So, with Grandfather en route to get the monkeys, the sun shining, I do believe I will spoil myself with milkshake, erm... er... And whatever else I can rustle up!

Me, XXtraordinary?

I've always know I was a bit special, though that is more likely to be "Special Needs" special as opposed to gifted-special. However, I wouldn't say I was anything better than A-Little-More-Than-Normal-Ordinary, let alone XXtraordinary.

However, the perv in me sees the XX as something else ;D

Hmmm, now I think about it, I wonder if the XX is actually a reference to being a female on a chromosomal level...

Thanks to Burg over at Sweet Insanity, she believes I am worthy of the XXtraordinary Blogger Award. Which is odd, because all I have done of late is whine, bitch, piss and moan.

Oh, and stab myself. OOOOWIE.

So I am thankful for the award - thank you darlin! Now to pass it on to five others? Hmmm... For everything they've been through in the last week or two, I tag the following people: Krista at Kristas Thoughts, Emma at M's Way, Posh Totty at Posh Tottys Palace, Nancy at Are We Having Fun Yet and Laney at My Crazy Family.

Let's just hope I don't end up looking like some of the crazies out there...

Breathe, People, Breathe!

At some point in the past, I did a quizzy thing that said I should be a mediator, a therapist or something "sit down and talk" style. And sometimes, I think about that quiz and think "what do you know" and pull out the chainsaw.

The last two or three days have been rather strange in blogland, with people messaging people, emails flying in all directions, but especially, people getting hit in the crossfire. Ordinarily, I would say talk it out, discuss it, move on, but this time, I'm popping out the chainsaw.

• If people are talking shit about you, ignore them. Don't try and mediate, just ignore them outright.
• People with posts making comments to other bloggers, with posts talking about anonymous bloggers, take them posts down. Like, now.
• Those of you using StatCounters/Trackers etc to find out who is who is where and stuff, remove it or stop using it - IP addresses, routing, and all that crap is a nightmare if you're not sure what you're looking at.
• If you're worried what people think of you, lock your blog and only invite those you trust.
• If you don't like someone, stay away from their blog, email, msn and whatever else.

Don't make me get the leg-smacking stick out. In short, if you don't like people, stay away from them, in person, online, whatever.

At the end of the day, life is too short for bitchiness, backstabbing and especially rumourmongers. Sure, I keep a lot of stuff off my blog, mostly because it's not "All Readers" safe, but most of my life is an open book - don't guess, judge and assume something about me. Hell, if you're THAT interested, just ask outright.

New Blogs On The Roll

I am a man of routine, but quite often, I take that routine and stick it somewhere dark and icky. Of course I mean the attic... Every day I read lots of blogs, mostly the ones on the sidebar there under (amazingly) "Blogroll"

Seriously, you can't miss them.

I've noticed more and more of late, that clicking the "Next Blog" button leads to one of a few types of blog:

• Something in a completely alien language
• Something older than some of you readers
• Something of angst and woe and "poetry"
• Something interesting

Sadly, for the most part, the blogs I find are all of the first three items. Finding an English-written blog is a mission in itself, and when I do find one, it's a year or more out of date, and then it's some mid-teen pouring their heart out about the evils of their life, how dark their soul is and so on...

Of late, I've started reading three new blogs, one from comments left here, one from an existing blogger, and a third from clicking "Next Blog" till the blisters on my fingers subsided. All three fall under the "Personal" category, with general chatter about whatever pops up.

• Can I Find Me is a blog by Debbie who, after focusing on her personal life, is working on how to change herself for the better by doing things for her and discussing her relationship in detail.
• Earth Girl I found randomly, and she blogs about whatever crosses her mind - a broken tooth of late, as well as previously being a victim of identity fraud.
• Krista's Thoughts by (cunningly) Krista is another personal blog covering her life, medical stuff, tags & memes (so tag her!) and general parental ramblings.

Go have a read, poke them and say hi! You don't have to say I sent you though ;)

Anyways, the blogroll is looking a bit tatty of late. I've been crossing out blogs that haven't been updated or have been locked to invited readers only. I'm contemplating deleting the dead blogs out there, but those that are still active can still be read... But for the time being, a strikethrough link is a blog that is either out of date or locked.

New Blogs To Read!

As you know, when I am not nailing kids to walls asking my cherubs to be quiet, when I am not playing WoW, and when I am not doing a million other things, I read blogs. I comment on blogs. And when I am needing to read more (and some people haven't updated in a millenia) I either press the button marked "Next Blog" which invariably leads me to either A) A Spam Blog, or B) A non-English blog.

So, at that point, I resort to following links. Links to links to links. The Blog Conga, I suppose it could be described as.

Quite often, I am surprised at the number of blogs that get put on the back burner where people lose time, interest or their mojo, but I'm more surprised that people keep links to blogs that are out of date by a year or more. Ho Hum.

Anyways, I've found more blogs to read! Hurrah! Go have a read, take a peek, say hi - whatever you like :D I'll be adding these to my blog roll this evening before the alcohol fumes overpower me.

Personal Blogs:

• GinaRobbo: Flicking through the regional part of Blogger, I found Gina in the same county category as me. So I suppose that makes her an Essex Girl - I won't go there tho, because, frankly, I'm outnumbered. Her blog covers her day to day life with her man and her dog, and like me, blogs the stuff that happens to her on a daily basis.
• The Gospel According To Rhys: OK, yes, he's Welsh, but we won't hold that against him. Not yet, anyway. Anyways, he's got a very dry sense of humour and his blog covers pretty much what he wants it to; personal life, babes, games reviews - all with a comedic spin.

Work Blogs:

• Area Trace No Search: It seems that a lot of the work blogs I read are based in the Emergency Services, and this is my first police blog. Like most of the others, he writes anonymously about his job, the politics involved and his daily goings-on. Very interesting to read, especially as my father was a police man.
• Purple Plus: A blog of a Paramedic working in, I assume, London. A self-proclaimed Stretcher Monkey complete with images of monkeys on his blog. Obviously, with his line of work, he discusses all aspects of his job, including the non-pretty calls. It makes for thought-provoking reading.

Adult Blog:
(Obviously, disclaimer, that the following link contains material of an adult nature, yada yada yada)

• Sexegesis: Marcelle writes from New York, and covers everything from perversions, to past relationships and her previous wild life. She writes frankly and powerfully, and is well worth the read. Don't think it's all smut though - she discusses other aspects of her life and lifestyle opening.

So there you have it. *hic* Go forward and read, leave them some love if you enjoy, link them up, whatever. *hic* Keep up the good work guys.

I Want To Thank My Director, and...

For the first time ever, I have been given an award. I am officially a Rockin' Guy Blogger, thanks to Mr Gman over on Man Overboard. Of course, the other side of this coin is that I have pass the award on to guys I believe to be Rockin'.

Which is rather difficult as, if you have gone through my blogroll, you will realise that mostly, they're all girlies. So, er, who to tag...

(Surprisingly, this took longer than I thought it would, even with the random channel-hopping I've had to do to keep Tam entertained!)

• Alan at Alan Says: He rambles on as much as I do when it comes to blogging, and even if he is a Librarian, he lives it up. I think he's still nursing a Baby Head Wetting Headache...
• Alan at An Old Salty Sailor: Despite the fact he's learning to knit, Alan puts up with crap from the unwashed public, working as a cabin crew member (air stewardess!), plus he knows how to party hard.
• Shiny Demon at The Misadventures of Me: A true Brit through and through, also working with the unwashed public on London Underground. He speaks his mind on anything that crosses it and enjoys a good rant.
• Tim at The Special Zipper: OK, despite being a criminal living in Australia, Tim works his arse off at work (which is secret) and on his trade-up challenge for charity. He's a good laugh and a good bloke, and totally deserves this award.
• Sweeney at The Trials & Tribulations of Sweeney: A fellows Basildon resident and also works with the public, also on London Underground, he's a new dad, is run around by his missus, and rants about life with the best of us.

Enjoy the award lads, remember to pass it on to other blokes you think deserve it, and I'll have a beer or three for each of you later today. As it is now, I am waiting for Her to bring me breakfast. Yes folks, it's before 10am, and she is not only UP, not only AWAKE, not only DRESSED, but she did the school run and Jaysens Christmas thingie this morning. Me - I am in my dressing gown, entertaining Tam with a hair dryer, watching kids TV. It's the middle of the week, and I am not dressed before 10am. Shocking.

Censoring Yourself

For the most part, I blog on an almost daily basis. I say "almost" because I tend to skip a few days here and there, take hiatus of a few days/weeks, but with multiple posts a day, I tend to post daily. And, it has to be said, when I post, I am not shy what the subject at hand is. My own misfortunes, the mishaps of others, happiness, sadness, fear, humour - whatever is on my mind, things that have happened - I tend to post it all.

But - as has been pointed out on more than one occasion - I don't talk about everything that goes on. Everything is a broad subject, and to be honest, I don't think people want to read about my every moment of a day in minute detail.

Imagine the loo breaks, for example... Exactly.

But there is stuff I do skip, brush over, or completely don't discuss. Politics and Religion are the two biggies that I don't/won't discuss and, as mentioned elsewhere, I don't do the former as it's a very localised thing, and I don't do the latter as, well, I simply don't believe. But added to this, these two subjects can be the biggest flame bait of them all, and I don't want that.

Aside from that, I like to believe that every thing on the blog is as real as it gets, but I know for a fact I censor myself fairly often. I change names to protect those that might be surfing for themselves. I skip some material because I know it's not something everyone wants to read. I also know that some members of both Jo's and my own family read the blog, and know that some things might cause, shall we say, issues. And, there are things that are generally private.

Yes folks, believe it or not, I have a private life.

And it got me to thinking... Of all the other blogs out there, I wonder how many of them are complete photocopies of someones life, or if, like me, they've edited themselves for the sake of friends, family, decency, work or whatever. Even the adult blogs I read, some are anonymous, some talk only about their adult life, most use false names. So even they censor themselves.

I sat with a pad and pencil this afternoon, and wrote a list of the general stuff I discuss on the blog, and along side, a list of the things I don't discuss. I'm not talking about the size and consistency of my last crap, but real information about me. I found the list of "Public" and "Censored" items were identical in length, and was a little surprised.

Our of all my friends, my family, my close relatives - out of everyone that visits this blog (and excluding Jo), I know of just two people that know pretty much all there is to know about me. Everything. And I'm not sure that is a good thing or a bad thing. Is it good that I have a life that people don't know or understand away from everything else, or is it bad that I only trust two people with the secrets of ME?

So, bloggers that read this, whether you've commented before or not, have a quick vote. Think about your blog, and the things you could put on it. Do YOU censor yourself, and if so, how much? Do you find yourself editing your posts all the time, checking over to make sure there's nothing that other would recognise? Do you occasionally change names or post something then edit out the juicy bits? Do you post all the gore, but change a few items at the last minute, or are you brave enough to post every facet of your life? Vote, Comment - anonymously if you like - I'm just seeing what is what out in the world.

Do you censor your life?

Select an option:

All the time
Sometimes
A few minor details
Not at all

Plus I am tired and headachey and getting ready for bed.

New Blogs!

When I am bored, I click. The higher the level of boredom, the higher the rate of clicking. I've gone through the blogger profile page links for hours on end, hacking my way through the Spam Blogs (splogs) in order to find that one gem that appeals to me.

A couple of weeks ago, I came across a couple of blogs that just tweaked my humour bone. And, in true 0ddness style, it occurs to me the author of both blogs work for London Underground. Coincidence, that they are both amusing chaps? Probably not - dealing with the unwashed masses has clearly done something to these chaps.

So, if you find yourself at a loose end, go check out The Misadventures of Me, and The Trials and Tribulations of Sweeney. Like true British Men, they swear and speak their mind, but if you read my crap, you can cope ;)

I Made It

I Made It?

A few years ago, a friend of mine started blogging. Her blog was a general day-to-day journal of stuff; thoughts, rants, humour, news stories - whatever sparked her interest, she'd blog it. I started reading it and a couple of her friends blogs, and thought "I can do that!"

So, using some other platform, I started blogging. I can't actually remember what my blog was called, but I do remember wrestling to hell and back with the layout code. I chatted and ranted, and had a couple of readers.

And then I forgot about it.

Fast forward a while longer, and I decided I actually DID enjoy it, and even though I couldn't remember anything about my other blog, I set up a new one on BlogSpot.

And that, ladies and gentlemen, brings me back to the point of this post.

This is post number 1000.

I've hit four-digit post numbers. Now, granted, some of my posts have been nothing more than a few lines or a picture or whatever, but never did I think "This will bump my post count" or "I'll post it for the sake of posting". And I can honestly say - even with the long hiatus I took after losing Bethany, this blog has been a lifeline to me. I don't know what I'd have done instead of blogging, but what if's and maybes - I tend to ignore them.

And in 1000 posts in almost four years, I've covered plenty, from the emotions of a newborn and losing Bethy, ranting about people or the weather, or about people moaning about the weather, the kids escapades, stupidity, bravery, injuries (personal and otherwise)... I think I've covered a lot. Even my writing style as changed - looking at the first posts from December 2003, I was writing in all lower-case.

Since I started blogging, so much in my life has changed, from family, employment, sickness... And over that time, the blog in it's many incarnations has been viewed, as of this morning over 43,000 times. I didn't get my first comment until August of 2004 - I think back then I had a hardcore reader base of about three people.

So, to you, my readers - Old and New alike - I thank you. Thanks for your visit today, thanks for reading, and thanks for being out there letting me know I blog for a reason - to entertain you. If you weren't out there, I'd probably still blog, but not as often. And to all my fellow bloggers, keep up the good work.

As an aside, and as everyone loves comments (especially me!), post in the comments section, say Hi, let me know how long you've been reading, and if there's anything you'd like to see!

Once again, thank you for being there for me.

-Dan

The Other Other Other White Meat

Waiting for the bus this afternoon, my eyes wandered to the shops near where I was standing, and when I saw this, I thought of Joansy and her post relating to the subject at hand ;)