Man Flu

I found this today and figured it was both amusing, informative and, well, true. Not that I have manflu anymore. Scratchy throat, cold-in-general, and a bit of a headache, but otherwise, my Advanced Care Practitioner was skilled enough to pull me back from the brink.

Very dangerous thing is “Man-’Flu”.

If left untreated it can rapidly turn into deadly ” ‘Flu-monia” (this only seems to occur in the Male if hours and days of laying on the couch and whinning for hot drinks / food / chocolate / crisps and lemsip are completely ignored by the attending spouse / girlfriend).

End stage symptoms include:

• Thumping headache from constant nagging of aforementiond spouse to “get up and go to work,”
• Inability to walk to Tesco to get more food / crisps / chocolate etc.
• Acute addiction to Jeremy Kyle / Trisha / Jerry Springer and Australian soap operas.
• Repetative Strain Injury and Carpal Tunnel Syndrome from over-use of the TV remote control.
• Hemiplegia from laying on your side all day ……

Normally a complete recovery is made with no adverse effects after the batteries in the remote have packed up and the house is devoid of all food / crisps /chocolate and the box of shortbread that has been sitting in the back of the cupboard since last christmas…

I think this should be printed and saved for households across the world...