Last night, for the first time in a fair while, we managed to offload the kids; Jaysen went to stay with Jo's mum, Tamsyn went to stay with a neighbour (which was nerve-wracking in and of itself). Our friend Amber hit 31 this week, and as all fun-loving adults, we decided to hit our local alternative club, The Pink Toothbrush. Yes, I am fully aware of what that is a euphanism for. If you don't know, you can always ask.

Anyway, we hit the wildlife at around 9pm, taking the piss out of one another in the cab there, and getting into the club with the rest of the crowd by half nine when we started to drink.

And Drink.

And Drink.

12.30am, we realised we had a half-hour before Mr Cab Driver would be outside, and decided we needed fried food. So we went to the best burger van for miles around, ate stacks of meat, onions, bun, sauces and pure cholesterol. We were all rather drunk, so it didn't count.

We piled back into the cab, got to the drop off point, and spent half an hour dancing and laughing in the street. It's amazing what happens when someone has an mp3 of the Austin Powers theme on their phone. So we bumbled home, got in, had some more laughs, then hit the sack around 3am. 8am I wake up with a bladder that would put a swimming pool to shame and stay half-awake till 10.30am when we crawled out of bed.

All morning I was complaining of my leg hurting, and come 4pm, I had a peek and it looks like I was hit by a car. I have an eight-inch bruise that no one can place. I didn't fall, get hit, get in a fight (I'm a cheery/laughy drunk), despite almost knocking out one of the crowd, and breaking the shoulder of another. So here I am limping around with a BoozeBruise. Very strange.

We did well last night on the bar though. Beer, Vodka, Beer, some sort of fruit-vodka mix, we blagged a few free shots for being so damn sexy, something bubblegum flavoured, something strawberry cheesecake flavoured. Jagemeister also came out to play, as did pernot, absinthe and whatever else we tried.

But I am blessed with not worrying about hangovers!

Anyway, aside from getting mysterious injuries, obviously, I am back :) During the week, we received a report that our "issues should be resolved" and I've managed to keep an internet connection for about an hour so far. A new record ;) Has to be said, Telewest-which-is-now-Virgin Media is officially shite. I have no idea what has changed since they got taken over, but they get two fat-thumbs down.

Hopefully last night being out late and up "early ish" has jiggered my body clock back into some form of semblance. I've not slept properly since last weekend, being awake for 20-22 hours mostly, and fighting sleep during the day so I might sleep at night. Booze & Painkillers is the next step ;)

Tomorrow is Fathers Day, so after calling my dad to say Hi, we're off to see Jo's dad who's home-alone this weekend. He's also fiddled with his webpage, so no doubt I'm going to have to redesign from the ground up. He "cleaned some stuff off" which invariably means "I deleted some important files". Yay.

And so, I bid you goodnight!

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5 Responses to “Booze-Bruise”

The Random One said...

Yay, you are back! Boozebruise and all!

Happy Father's Day.

Did you ever see the "Dawn of the Dan" video..??

DriedPapercutsAndChickens said...

hey dan! guys celebrate fathers day the same time as us but not mothers day....

debbie said...

Nice to have you back Dan, I am so surprised that you are having trouble with Virgin, I was NTL now virgin to and had no problems at all,,

great you managed to get out and hope that the children were ok,,, oh happy fathers day too Dan

Nancy Jensen said...

Gosh! I need a new cow chair. And I gotta see your boozebruise.

Glad you are back. Now stop breaking things!

Terri@SteelMagnolia said...

Was going to say happy daddy's day..but I think I've already said it ...