Directions

"'scuse me mate..." the strange old man called from his car window..

Usually, I notice these sorts.  Invariably, they drive past slowly, peering around through their windows.  Then they go past again in the opposite direction, then back, and forth.

I should probably interject here, that this is during the day, that I am NOT on a street corner, and I am NOT implying these are dirty old men looking for, shall we say, the companionship of a strapping young man me.

No, that isn't such an issue.  At least, I don't think it would.  "Piss off you dirty perv." would probably be my reply.  But I'm sure that's a post for another day.

No, this Strange Old Man was worse than a kerb crawler.  This one was lost.

"'scuse me mate -" the strange old man called from his car window after pulling up beside me "- how do I get to the other end of Long Riding?"

Now, to most people, getting from one end of a road to the other is a simple case of "Go Forward, stop when the road runs out" but Long Riding is different.  Due to the fact this road "ends" at the town centre, it would make for one hell of a short cut from this side of Basildon to the centre.  So, halfway down Long Riding, where another road crosses it, there is a "Buses Only" section.


See this picture:  Follow Long Riding, see where Church Road crosses it - you can't drive all the way down it.

So to go from here to the other end of the road, you have to go waaaay around the houses.

Back to the strange old man.  "How do I get to the other end of Long Riding?" he asks through the window.  So, I explain it to him in nice easy terms.  "OK, you need to turn -" "Sorry mate -" he interrupts, "- you'll have to speak up, I'm a bit deaf..."

Great.

"You need to turn around -" I say in a loud voice "- and at the end, turn left.  Keep going till you hit the big roundabout, then it's left, follow Broadmayne till you see a slip road to the left onto Church Road.  Go down there, and then second right is the other half of Long Riding."

Now, if you check my map above, you'll see that is indeed the case. 

"No, I've been that way." said the strange old man.  Ah, not strange, just nuts.  "I went down there and there's no Long Riding down that way."  I paused, had a think and ran the journey through my head.  End, left, straight, left, left, second right.

"I think you'll find I'm right...  Turn around, left at the mini roundabout, straight on till the big roundabout where you turn left again, then down Broadmayne, left onto Church Road, then it's second on the right - that's Long Riding."

"Are you sure?" he asked.  I felt like saying "Actually, you got me... I'm a tourist from Kenya and really have no idea how roads work in England..." but didn't.  "Quite sure." I replied, being that, you know, I was completely sure.

"Hmmm... OK then, thanks a lot."
"No worries, good luck." I replied.

So, he turned around, drove past with a wave, and got to the end of Long Riding.

Where he turned right.