Gravity. It Works

This picture captures a very rare moment in the world. This is the moment that yours truely confirmed the existence of gravity.

See, today, Gemma, me and the girls went to North Weald Nature Reserve. We walked through forests, over hills, around lakes, through meadows...

Of course, the Forest area contained lots of very large trees. Trees that my 12 year old self love to climb, and being that I am still actually 12 I decided I'd climb one. It was a very large old oak, with lots of hand-and-foot holds.

Easy Peasy.

So, up I jumped, ready to scale it. Not sure if I was going UP or if I was just going to go around it. At about thirty feet off the ground (or, maybe three) Gemma shouted up, carefuly you don't fall backwards.

I may have Pfft'd her words, but at that very moment there was an ominous CRACK from my hand hold. Gravity tried to do it's thing, and I tried to find another hand-hold.

There wasn't one.

With my feet FIRMLY planted on the tree, I toppled backwards. Somehow - being that I am the most dexterous man alive - I managed to flip around in mid-air, and landed in the THANKFULLY soft undergrowth. On my knee.

However, such was my momentum, that I physically bounced off the ground, flipped again, and ended my stunt facing the sky through the canopy.

Me and Gemma were absolutly wetting ourselves with laughter. How she didn't piss her pants I don't know. It was all I could do to get up while laughing so hard. Gemma had mascara running down her face, I had tears streaming... The girls thought we were crying!

Anyway, despite everything, I was ok... Bust a gut laughing mind, and my knee is a bit sore but I'll survive.

Thank f$ck she wasn't filming it...

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4 Responses to “Gravity. It Works”

Anonymous said...

Oh my god it was the funniest thing ever. I really thought all the laughing would make me pee my pants!!!!! Just reading it on here makes me think about it and start laughing again.

Total gold moment there bruv.

(I would have split the £250 with you had I filmed it say 80% to me and 20% to you!!!).

Em's way said...

roflmao Classic Dan! Thank you so much for brightening my day :D (and Dan ... leave the trees to Tam, she is sooo much better at climbing than you are ;) )

GreenCastle said...



glad youhad a good day :o)

Posh Totty said...

I'd have paid good money to see that, do you think you could do an action replay for me next time we meet up?