The Truth Revealed!

Brace yourselves here folks. Men-Folk, I have gone against the natural order of things and once again, given an insight into the true workings of that bizarre of creatures, the most devious, sly and notoriously-difficult beast to work with...

The female.

If you cast your minds back, I entered the Pit of Oestrogen in 2006 and dispelled that mighty of myths, the "Oh Woe Is Me, I'm On And Can't Do Anything" Yes folks, my faithful hound assisted me in the disproving of that special little myth, and the females tried to rally against me and silence me, but I went into hiding while the storm settled.

And now, through the powers of investigation and prying into their kind once again, I bring you the answer to that age old question, that question:

"Why do women go to the toilet together"
Over the years, scientists have theorised it was their Pack Mentality, a trait discarded by men as useless. Others have said they have heard whisperings of secret rituals, or initiations, or rubbing oil on one anothers chests...

However - and at great danger to myself - I bring you this, wormed from the grip of an actual woman:

Click to Embiggen

There you have it, conclusive proof that they go to the toilets in packs in order to hold one another up so none have to sit on a possibly dirty toilet seat. Clearly, a survive technique passed down through the generations, preventing them transmitting germs, regardless of them going to the loo and then clinging to a friend...

Unlike the superior Male of the species, who just stands, points and aims. The women might make mention of "splashing" and "missing" but that is simply part of marking of the territory - which is why the women have to mop it up, due to feeling threatened....

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10 Responses to “The Truth Revealed!”

Dan said...

Oh I suspect it is you who will be dead first... When the others of your kind turn on you for sharing your tribes biggest secret for all these years.

No honour amongst wenches...

Anonymous said...

Sorry gals, he made me say it

Dan said...

Ouch, a woman admitting to being outwitted by a Male... It really doesn't look good for you...

Anonymous said...

When plyed with alcohol first it weakens ones deffences, so I didnt stand a chance.

Sorry gals

The Random One said...

Amazing! Dan responded. lol

The Sween! said...

You do like to stir things up, don't ya Dan?

Em's way said...

Dan I am shocked, how could you take advantage of a poor inebriated woman like that :P

Anonymous said...

So, erm, why are women's toilets so dirty if it's only clean loving women that use them?

Do women's toilets only have men cleaners then?

Mary Fran Muir said...

I should know better than reading your blog before bed! Last night I dreamt about getting help in the loo!

g-man said...

Excellent exposé Dan!!! Mystery solved. :)