The Intarweb LIES!

The internet as we know it is full of lies.  Lies, Mistruths, Incorrectness and general falsehoods.

To be fair, I've never (EVER!) fallen for virus warnings of the sort that will end the world and require you to warn everyone you know.  Phishing scams and the like make me chuckle, and as we all know, I enjoy tormenting these people.  Scams and Urban Legends and the rest of it I read, smirk, and wonder who falls for it.

But there are other things out there that you would assume be safe from LIES, and this my friends, is my confession.

I sort of fell for something.

See, 0dd Sister, Gemma, is a collector of recipes.  And with me plodding through the world of the internet and collecting recipes, she shared with me her Big Folder O' Food™ and I had a perusal of it.  Being a lazy so-and-so, and being a fan of Malt Loaf, I saw what can only be described as a really lazy and perhaps "too good to be true" recipe for said-loaf.

I looked at it, and Gemma was sort of "meh" over it.  I wrote it down, and later in the week, showed Kellie who, it has to be said, mocked me and it.  "THAT -" she declared in a matter-of-fact tone of voice that only a woman can do "- is not a recipe for malt loaf"

Of course, she could have told me it would end the world as we knew it, and I would have still tried it.  So, today, I went shopping, got the couple of bits I needed for it, and proceeded to make it.  For the record, I shall write the entire recipe and method here.  Which, after looking at it, I have to say, it does look a bit... well, like someone added it for comedy purposes.
"Preheat oven to gas mark 4.  Put 3 weetabix, 4oz sugar and 4oz of raisins or sultanas in a mixing bowl.  Add 1 mug of hot black tea.  Leave to soak until the mixture has gone cold.  Stir and add 2 eggs.  Stir again and add 2oz Self-Raising Flour and 2oz Porridge Oats.  Mix thoroughly, add to loaf tin and bake."
And THAT is it.  Easy, clear, simple...

To be honest with you, my house now smells like someone has puked up a load of weetabix, and I've baked it.  Maybe - somehow - I did something wrong, or used... I don't know, "crap" instead of "flour" but it's not a nice smell.  And, for good measure, I've eaten some.  Kinda tastes like it smells, to be honest.

So, to 0dd Sister - remove the recipe ASAP ;)  To Kellie, shuddup!

Ooooh EDIT McEdit!  Now the "loaf" has cooled, I am happy to report it's actually not too bad.  In fact, it's rather nice!  Jaysen is well impressed with it too!  Now, it's NOT Malt Loaf that you'd buy in the shops, but then, I only used the cheapest ingredients that I could buy, so who knows, using proper stuff, it might taste even nice.  But, I stand corrected.  It is nice!

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2 Responses to “The Intarweb LIES!”

Anonymous said...

As I said at the time, I have never tried to cook it so cannot be held responsible and I just collect these recipes I didnt make it up lol. Shame on you for blaming me tut. I shall not share my lovely soup with you *humph*


Posh Totty said...

You should try fish finger sandwiches its much safer ;oP