I am a geek.  Everyone knows this, it's not something I keep secret from anyone, and usually if we're out somewhere and I get a whiff of there being something technological or full-on geekery, I am there.

Of course, this doesn't mean I love all technology - far from it.  I look at Blackberry phones for example and think "urgh" and the iPhone does nothing for me.  None the less, I can appreciate the tech behind them.

So imagine my surprise last week when I was shopping to see my usual brand of toilet paper baring a massive slogan: "New Easy Start Roll Techology"

Oooh thinks my boy-brain.  Now, I didn't buy it specifically for the technology behind it, and the price appeared to be the same as usual, so I slapped it in my basket and carried on.

As it turned out, I didn't actually need-need loo roll, so it's taken all this time to open it.  No, I will not open a new packet unless the previous purchases are finished.  Every time I've gone into the loo I've been keeping an eye on the existing stock in a hope I would get to see this "New Easy Start Roll Technology"

Ladies and Gents, today was that day.  Today, I opened the packaging expecting... Well, with hindsight, I am not entirely sure what I was expecting.  I can't say I've ever had much need improving my roll-starting technique.  Sure, I usually shred a few sheets due to the fact they glue it down, but none the less, this was New Easy Start Roll Technology.

Do you know what this "technology" comprised of.  No longer do they glue the first inch of paper down - hence the usual shredding - no siree.  No, the "new technology" involves leaving the first inch UNglued, and putting the glue a little further on the roll.

That's. It.

And you know what else?  I STILL shredded the first couple of sheets because they put sodding glue on tissue paper!!

Asda, hang your head in shame.  This is not "New Technology" this is just you putting the glue an inch further on the paper.

Yes, I am ranting about loo paper and my gullibility.  Stupid sodding paper.

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One Response to “Technology!”

Posh Totty said...

Oh Dear! Dan, you really should get out more.